Banana-bana fo-fana

Thanks, pepperinapress, for this little diversion. (Have I updated the Weekly Poem, or the Urban Hip Accessories? No. No.)

Name Game (time's a wastin')

Here goes:

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)

Linus Public Transportation

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)

Peanut Butter Peanut Butter

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)

Green Turtle

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)

Hanover (I have no middle name. Turns out I'm like Cher.)

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)

Mor-Ka

6. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink)

The Blue Gimlet

7. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)

Albert Scott (Unaccountably, I have trouble getting endorsements.)

8. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy)

Grapefruit Mounds (I'm not making this up...)

9.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names )

Kent (My mother has no middle name either. No one will EVER find me.)

10. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter)

Diener Denver

11. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower)

Autumn Hydrangea

12. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)

Cranberry Cami

13. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree)

Oatmeal Chinese Maple

14. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”),

The Wirewrap Storm Tour


Confused? Me too.

etsy urban hip, week 14: tutus, tequila & federales

I'm loving my girls especially much this week, as they're helping smooth all my little annoyances with grace and goofyness. Here's to a successful fall, ladies; you're all delightful and I wish we could don our gay apparel and meet in person. Thanks for being the most supportive and hilarious Etsy-buddies I could ask for. As for my gentle readers, I apologize for the preponderance of inside jokes; enjoy our latest treasures (and have fun storming the castle)!


Vintage leather and crazy quilt cuff with skeleton key closure from New Orleans by bayousalvage, $24.00

Fast Lane Lariat by fringe, $42.00

No. 199 BROADWAY BABY by Talula, $26.00


Red Velvet Cake by boringsidney, $125.00

Absinthe Earrings by leavesofglass, $22.00

weekly poem

Sonnet

No seduction in the hothouse, its aisles
of deliberate orchids only heave
beneath ceiling fans.  The horticulturist's
a bawd--her monstrous offspring affront
with chromatic perfection, charm in array.

But when the orange orchard blossoms,
I am thrown.

Raptures in the garden?  Never once did rows
of carrot so well-weeded yield
a swoon. Beware that flim-flam man,
the farmer, I grouse in passing, sowing
season by season an almanac theology.

But when orange blossoms wave
in pneumatic arcades, I dither. I coo. I hallelu.

- by Kimberly Johnson (from 32 Poems)

weekly poem

Tony Hoagland is a great writer to introduce to anyone who thinks poetry is dead. Or who thinks it's boring, or thinks it all has to rhyme, or that they don't like poetry. His tone is so conversational, effortlessly familiar and often riotously funny, that you don't really notice being chatted along to a smack upside the head until you get to it. But, boy, will you notice when you get there.

When Dean Young Talks About Wine

The worm thrashes when it enters the tequila.
The grape cries out in the wine vat crusher.

But when Dean Young talks about wine, his voice is strangely calm.
Yet it seems that wine is rarely mentioned.

He says, Great first chapter but no plot.
He says, Long runway, short flight.
He says, This one never had a secret.
He says, You can't wear stripes with that.

He squints as if recalling his childhood in France.
He purses his lips and shakes his head at the glass.

Eight-four was a naughty year, he says,
and for a second I worry that California has turned him
into a sushi-eater in a cravat.

Then he says,
This one makes clear the difference
between a thoughtless remark
and an unwarranted intrusion.

Then he says, In this one the pacific last light of afternoon
stains the wings of the seagull pink
at the very edge of the postcard.

But where is the Cabernet of rent checks and asthma medication?
Where is the Burgundy of orthopedic shoes?
Where is the Chablis of skinned knees and jelly sandwiches?
with the aftertaste of cruel Little League coaches?
and the undertone of rusty stationwagon?

His mouth is purple as if from his own ventricle
he had drunk.
He sways like a fishing rod.

When a beast is hurt it roars in incomprehension.
When a bird is hurt it huddles in its nest.

But when a man is hurt,
he makes himself an expert.
Then he stands there with a glass in his hand
staring into nothing
as if he were forming an opinion.

- by Tony Hoagland (from his book What Narcissism Means to Me, 2003)

etsy urban hip, week 13(ish): scrumdiddlyumptious

I've been remiss with the urban hip project, I admit it. I got a little sidetracked with another project I hope to blog about later in the week. No promises, as they would be totally worthless.

But here's what my clever girlfriends came up with while I wasn't looking - aren't they sharp? And don't we look good together? I've added the marvelous urbanheirlooms to our ranks; please peruse her wares!

No. 068e CONTESSA by Talula; $24.00.

Phantom in the Top Hat by BoringSidney; $85.00.

Spellbound Luxury Cowl by fringe; $94.00.

Antique Turq Knot Tassel Necklace by urbanheirlooms; $50.00.

Intermission Lantern Earrings by leavesofglass; $18.00.

Bayou Bijoux irish lace rose recycled vintage leather sweet necklace collar from down de bayou by bayousalvage; $30.00.